Amaretto
by Taril
Summary: Tsuna finds himself the unwilling and unknowing successor to the foreign nightclub chain Vongola.
1. Opening

**AN:** This is an AU. About the nightclub chain Vongola. Have fun.

**Title:** Amaretto - Opening  
**Part:** 1/?**  
****Rating:** G?  
**Pairing: **Gen  
**Warnings:** AU? Failure of an attempt at serious fic? I seem to have trouble writing non-crack.  
**Summary: **Tsuna finds himself the unwilling and unknowing successor to the foreign nightclub chain Vongola.

* * *

Today was a normal day. A normal day in the normal life of a normal first year university student who was going home from school. It just so happens that in this very normal first year's backpack, lay an essay with a mark of 27%. Really, it wasn't so bad. He improved slightly from the first essay. Just because he wasn't as smart as everyone else in the class didn't mean he wasn't a normal student. That being said, he'd been failing his exams ever since middle school, and mysteriously passing his finals even though he knew he failed them all miserably.

That's right. Sawada Tsunayoshi was a failure.

Tsuna turned into a small side street and headed towards one of the gates that most houses had. He headed for the front door, ignoring the daisies that lined his path. He could already feel the bed under him, his soft pillow beneath his head. Home was a relaxing place.

Tsuna entered the house and proceeded to take off his shoes. Or, that's what he should have been doing. Instead, he stood frozen in the doorway with the muzzle of a handgun pressed into his forehead. "HIIIIIIIII!" Even if he was a failure, he was too young to die, right? "So you're Sawada Tsunayoshi. You have a lot to work on." The world seemed to slow down infinitely as Tsuna watched the stranger pull the trigger.

The sound of footsteps sounded from the direction of the kitchen.

"Tsu-kun, is that you? Tsuna's mother walked into the foyer. Upon seeing the situation in front of her, she beamed. "Oh, I see you've met your new home tutor! Well, don't just stand there, Tsu-kun. Sit down and I'll introduce him to you." Tsuna stared aghast as the man tipped his fedora at Nana, while still pointing the gun at him. The gun never fired. He was still alive. And his would-be murderer was going to be his home tutor.

Nana ushered them into the dining room.

Sitting on a chair, Tsuna watched a tiny chameleon lounge on the tutor's fedora, its green bright against the solid black material, as his mother carried on about finally getting a chance to see his grades improve. The man, who looked like he walked out of a mafia movie, was being invited wholeheartedly to live in their house by his mother. Sometimes, his mother was just too generous.

After all the necessary introductions, Tsuna was free to retreat to his room to contemplate the horror that was intruding into his life. He sagged onto his bed and sighed. From the voices carrying through his door, he assumed his mother was showing that tutor to the guest room. The guest room that happened to be right across the hall from his. What was his name, Reborn? What kind of tutor has a name like Reborn? And normal people don't look that shady! No matter how he looked at it, it had to be a scam.

Speaking of scams, that scam of a tutor was standing in front of him. Strange, did his mother already go back downstairs? He hadn't heard his door open either. "Sawada Tsunayoshi. As your home tutor, I will make you into the finest nightclub owner in the world." Tsuna stared at Reborn. "…Huh? What? Is this some kind of a joke-" The tutor tugged on the rim of his fedora. "And we will start your training by making you study for your midterms with your dying will." Tsuna gaped. "What is this nonsense-" The muzzle of Reborn's gun pressed between his eyes. "Understand, Tsuna?" It took too long for the gun to leave his face and disappear back into Reborn's suit jacket.

"You, Tsuna, will be the future owner of the nightclub Vongola. The current owner has decided that you will inherit his business. For your training, you will be placed as the manager of Vongola's newest chain establishment in Japan, effective immediately. It is up to you to staff this new nightclub accordingly and run this joint as you see fit. Of course, if you decide to refuse this inheritance the current owner has so generously given you, you will be sued. And you will definitely lose that lawsuit." Tsuna stared dumbly. "I'm only eighteen! Can't he pick someone who actually has experience? Wait, lawsuit? I've never heard of this nightclub, let alone some inheritance-" Reborn stared down at him. "All the other candidates are in jail. You are the only option the owner has left. This isn't just some regular part-time job, Tsuna. This is your future." Tsuna sat frozen in the sound of footsteps and the closing click of the guest room door.

The rest of the evening consisted of Tsuna trying to convince his mother over dinner that he did not need a home tutor, to no avail, and reading the assigned pages in his books, which he gave up on relatively quickly. As Tsuna lay in bed, he heard the guest room door open and footsteps leaving the room. After watching the minute hand on his clock slide past several painted lines, the footsteps returned and the guest room door closed again. It was dark outside the curtains of his bedroom window.

Kyoko was standing in front of him. She was giving him Valentine's Day chocolates. And then the covers were being ripped off Tsuna's bed. "Ngh… Five more minutes…" Half asleep, Tsuna heard a rustling sound come from somewhere above him. Then there was an eardrum-shattering bang and something whizzed by Tsuna's ear. "HIIIII!" He remembered that there was now a trigger-happy home tutor living in his house. "Re… Reborn? What was that for?" The home tutor tsked. "Hn, I missed." Tsuna gestured wildly at the hole in his pillow. "What do you mean you missed? Why'd you do that? I could've died!" Reborn tucked away his gun and turned to leave. "You really are no good, Tsuna. I expect you to prepare and be down for breakfast in five minutes. Don't be late. I really don't want to waste anymore bullets on you."

He was going to die an early and painful death. That was the predominant thought in Tsuna's head as he trudged down the stairs. "Tsu-kun, what a surprise! You're up earlier than usual!" His mother placed a bowl of rice in front of him. "Only the first day, and we're already seeing results! I should've thought of this earlier." Tsuna sat down at the table and squinted blearily at his breakfast. "Mom…" Yes, whining to his mother at the age of eighteen was going to make his new tutor, however homicidal, see him in a better light. Definitely. Just look at that guy, lounging on that chair like he owns the place, that stupid green lizard on his fedora, and his gun lying there comfortably beside his food and oh god his mother will see it! Nana smiled, "Why, Reborn-san, that's a really nice gun replica you have there. Is it your hobby?" What. The tutor (he must be part of the mafia; he just has to be) glanced at Tsuna. And said, "You could say that. I also enjoy target practice." How could his mother, his own mother, let this man do these things to her only son? "My, such a well-rounded young man. Tsu-kun would do well to learn from you." His mother has been swayed by the devil.

Tsuna ate his breakfast as fast as he could without inhaling his rice. The faster he ate, the faster he could go to school and leave this retardation behind. His chopsticks clacked against the bowl and the chair scraped as he pushed it in. "Mom, I'm leaving!" The front door slammed behind him as he left to catch his bus. Good thing Reborn wasn't with him. He'd probably pull out his gun (where'd he get it, anyway?) and have Tsuna arrested by association. The rest of the bus ride was blissfully filled with thoughts of Kyoko.

Half an hour later, the bus arrived at its destination. Tsuna glanced at his watch. For once, he was on time (he refused to attribute it to Reborn). The university loomed from across the road and he realized he never finished his assigned readings. Oh well. Preparing to cross the road, Tsuna's brain promptly performed a mental shutdown as a group of girls strolled past him. Kyoko-chan, his sweet, adorable Kyoko-chan! His angelic Kyoko-chan! Tsuna was sure he'd died and gone to heaven. "So that's Kyoko, eh?" The girls had crossed the road and the incoming traffic blocked out any sight of them. Tsuna sagged against the lamp post in bliss. "Of course that's Kyoko-chan! She's so pretty… Hiiii! Reborn? Why are you here?" And then promptly got kicked out of heaven and thrown straight into hell.

Reborn adjusted his fedora and surveyed the school. "Don't fall asleep in class today, Tsuna." With that, he walked off. Tsuna stared. Not only was his tutor trigger-happy, he was also a stalker. He sighed. Might as well get today's classes over with.

It was only when he was halfway through his last class did he realize he never told Reborn who Kyoko was.

After nearly an hour of monotone lecturing, the professor ended the class and the rustling of papers transformed into a hubbub of voices as students prepared to leave. Tsuna shoved his notebook in his bag and reached for his pencil case. A piece of paper slid onto the desk as he picked up the case. Unfolding it, he read the contents scrawled on it.

By the time he arrived, the sun was beginning to set. It didn't help that he was nearly waylaid several times by suspicious looking people standing outside various equally suspicious establishments. Tsuna stared. He seemed to be doing that a lot lately. In front of him stood a building in the last stages of construction. The dark gray stucco was nearly black in the setting sun; it seemed to have been applied recently. Beyond the double doors still covered in their plastic wrapping drifted out faint murmurs of conversation. The second floor windows were dark. There was no visible signage that he could see. It was quite an elegant building, if not for the fact that it was situated in the red-light district.

The murmurs within the building faded and one of the double doors swung open. Reborn stood half-turned in the doorway, looking to his side. He exchanged several words with a person standing out of sight, nodded, then stepped out into the street. The door swung shut behind him.

"Tsuna." Reborn placed his hands in his pockets. "I see you didn't get lost. You're not as hopeless as you look." Tsuna wondered briefly if Reborn had made it his goal to demean him at every moment possible. He then wondered if Reborn had just complimented him in a really backhanded way. Indignation surged through him. "You told me to come to the red-light district just to see if I'd get lost? Aren't you a tutor? Shouldn't you be tutoring me instead of going off to shady places like this?" Reborn's impassive eyes stared out from under the rim of his fedora. In the setting sun, he seemed to blend in with the dark building behind him. "Tutoring lesson number one, Tsuna. Know the location of your business. In this case, Vongola is still being built. When it's complete, be sure to have your staff ready." Reborn gave the building a fleeting look. "I'd say you have about a week." He glanced at his wristwatch. "Just in time for dinner. See you at home, Tsuna. Don't get detained."

Tsuna stood rooted to the spot. He glanced frantically from the departing tutor to the building and back again. "My what- What do you mean, my staff? Are you serious? Reborn!"

Reborn didn't give any indication of having heard him.

Tsuna wailed and ran after his tutor.

Nothing was worse than getting lost in the red-light district after dark.

* * *

**AN:** ...Yeah.


	2. Batting Average

**Title:** Batting Average  
**Part:** 2/?  
**Rating:** G  
**Summary:** Yamamoto is introduced to Reborn.

* * *

Yamamoto Takeshi was a good guy.

He was friendly and he seemed to instantly transform every person he met into a friend. He was very athletic, a treasured member of the university's baseball club. He also had a bright smile, one that implied that all was well in the world. Back in middle school, these traits had made him a walking target for avid girls seeking his attention. This trend had continued into high school, though with a slight decrease in avid followers. Then with the move into university, the attention had dwindled, the large class sizes making extended socialization difficult.

Tsuna was glad for this change. It meant Yamamoto and he could now eat lunch in peace. No longer did he have to eat his lunch to the tune of girls confessing their love and the baseball player turning away each and every one of them. While Tsuna truly felt sorry for those girls, he was never very keen on having his lunch spoiled by others' disappointment.

He always thought Yamamoto's followers were a bit like stalkers. Not that he would dare say it out loud.

"Ha ha!" Yamamoto was laughing. "Your new tutor sounds fun. I should drop by sometime. Maybe he can help me with my essay." Tsuna nearly inhaled his rice. No, his tutor was not fun. Nor should Yamamoto drop by any time soon. Somehow, the idea of Reborn and Yamamoto being together in the same room, let alone the same building, sent fear racing through his mind. An image of Yamamoto in a black suit holding a gun emerged in his head. Tsuna could hear the universe laughing at him. Maybe he had done something wrong in a previous life and now fate was punishing him for it.

Tsuna sighed. Thinking about the recent intrusion into his previously peaceful life was making him lose his appetite. He tried to steer the conversation in a more appetite-friendly direction. "How's the restaurant, Yamamoto?" His friend chewed thoughtfully, his ever present smile on his face. "Same as usual. Dad's still going at it. You should come by some time, Tsuna. Dad's been saying how he hasn't seen you in a while." He could feel his appetite returning. Tsuna nodded. "Tell your dad thanks. Maybe I'll drop by later this week." Yamamoto laughed and clapped Tsuna on the back. "Haha! Dad will love to hear that. I bet he's going to make you lots of sushi!" Tsuna wanted to reply, but Yamamoto clapping him on the back had made him swallow his rice prematurely, and now he was trying to cough it back out.

"Ah, I have class soon. See you later, Tsuna." Yamamoto put his now-empty lunch box away and stood. Having finally dislodged the chunk of rice in his throat, Tsuna returned his wave as the other boy left. He had another hour to spare. Maybe he should go to the library to do some homework. If he didn't finish it by the time he got home, who knew what Reborn would do. He might actually get shot this time.

Outside, the sky was a clear blue, with small tufts of white cloud, like floating cotton balls. Above the faint spring breeze, the faraway drone of an airplane drew his attention. Overhead, the source of the disturbance was faint but distinguishable. If Tsuna squinted, he could pick out red and green on the tail of the plane. Maybe one day, he too could go travelling.

Tsuna sat down at an empty table and pulled out his homework. There were assigned readings from his literature class, papers to read for his political science classes, and an upcoming midterm. He sighed. And he thought high school was a pain. At least Reborn wasn't here with him. With the way his teaching methods were, his tutor would probably end up shooting several innocent passerby. That wouldn't be good. He definitely did not want to be expelled because his tutor was homicidal.

Looking back, the past few days had been hectic, to say the least. Ever since Reborn had taken up residence at the Sawada household, Tsuna had been threatened with a gun multiple times, woken up rudely with aforementioned threats, and forced to study with his dying will, also with the same threats. Truthfully, he was beginning to get tired of being forced to do things at gunpoint, but there was no way he was going to bring that point up with Reborn. Not even with his dying will would he dare to say a word about it. Who knew what Reborn's response would be.

As to whether he was learning more, he wasn't sure. What he was sure about was high tension situations were not good for committing school material to one's long term memory.

Tsuna briefly wondered where Reborn went during the day when he was at school. He shook his head. It was better not to think about it.

At least Reborn hadn't said anything about the nightclub since that day at the red-light district. Tsuna still had trouble accepting that he was inheriting a nightclub. He had thought Reborn was joking, but then he had seen the building in person. It was real. He really was going to inherit a nightclub. He didn't even know who he was inheriting it from. And what Reborn had said that day; how he had to staff his nightclub in one week. That was impossible. There was no way he could find enough people to man a nightclub in less than one week. Was it even legal for an eighteen year old to run a nightclub? Impossible. It must be a joke. A practical joke. Tsuna suddenly imagined Yamamoto in a waiter's uniform, serving alcohol to giggling women in a shady establishment. Oh god. Please never let that happen. Hopefully, Reborn would forget about it.

Tsuna looked down and realized he was holding his book in a death grip. He quickly placed it back down on the table. It was all too stressful for him. Needing a distraction, he checked his cell phone. It was almost time for his class to start. Looking down at his work, he saw that he only got through half of his required readings before he had become too distracted by his thoughts. Reborn was going to kill him.

After three more hours of grueling class, Tsuna was finally free to go home. Not that home was really any better than school.

He saw Yamamoto at the bus stop, who cheerfully raised a hand in greeting as he walked up. "Yo, Tsuna."

"Yamamoto, didn't you finish class already?" On Thursdays, Yamamoto always finished class earlier than him. Yamamoto grinned at him. "The baseball club had a meeting today, so I'm later than usual." Ah yes, Yamamoto's baseball club. He had heard from Yamamoto that they were attending a baseball game in a month.

"Remember the time you got hit in the face with a baseball in middle school, Tsuna?"

Tsuna sighed. "Please don't remind me of that again, Yamamoto."

His friend smiled blankly. "Remind you of what, Tsuna?"

Tsuna blinked at Yamamoto. "Didn't you say something about hitting me with a baseball back in middle school?" Yamamoto smiled a negative.

A dark shadow moved behind Yamamoto. "And that was the only reason you two got to know each other."

"Hiii!" A ghost! A ghost was haunting Yamamoto!

Reborn's chameleon blinked lazily at Tsuna from its perch on his owner's fedora. "You stupidly walked across the baseball field during one of the baseball club's practices, and Yamamoto, who was practicing his pitching, threw his baseball. Because you happened to walk into the line of fire, it hit you squarely in the face. It was a miracle nothing broke, wasn't it, Tsuna?"

Tsuna stood rooted in horror. This was blasphemy.

"And that was how you two became friends. And have been friends ever since, it appears." Reborn adjusted his fedora and his eyes slid to Yamamoto's smiling face. "Yamamoto Takeshi."

Yamamoto laughed. "Is this a friend of yours, Tsuna?" He thought he had put it all behind him. How did Reborn get information like that? Maybe it was through extortion. That tutor seemed the type to resort to extortion to achieve his goals.

"My name is Reborn. I am Tsuna's home tutor." And there he goes introducing himself to Yamamoto. Tsuna's worst nightmare was coming to life. "Haha! What an interesting guy. Nice to meet you!" Oh man. Hopefully, Reborn wouldn't offer Yamamoto a job at the nightclub. "Tsuna has a proposition for you, Yamamoto Takeshi." Run for your life, Yamamoto. Please, save yourself before it's too late. "A position as the nightclub Vongola's bartender." He knew he shouldn't have gotten his hopes up.

Tsuna tried to stop the horrific chain of events from unfolding. "Why are you here, Reborn? Shouldn't you be, I don't know, somewhere else?" His tutor pulled at his fedora. "I had business to attend to in this area, so I decided to stop by." One corner of his mouth lifted. "Wasn't it a good thing I stopped by, Tsuna?" His eyes moved back to Yamamoto. "Your answer, Yamamoto."

"Haha, sounds interesting, but I don't know a thing about bartending." Thank you so much, Yamamoto. The corners of Reborn's mouth twitched. "You will learn, Yamamoto. The pay is generous." Bribery. This was bribery. Yamamoto smiled benignly. Reborn paused slightly. "Think of it as baseball practice with alcohol instead of baseballs." That made no sense whatsoever. Yamamoto smiled in amusement. "In that case, why not. It's always good to try something new, right, Tsuna?"

Tsuna wanted to bash his head into the bus stop signage, except that would count as vandalizing public property. He really needed to learn how to say no.

"Congratulations, Tsuna. You have your first employee." Reborn was smirking at him. Yamamoto looked amused. "Tsuna's my boss? Sounds cool." Tsuna waved his hands frantically. "No, you've got the wrong idea! I'm not-"

"Tsuna is the future owner of the nightclub Vongola. As of now, he is the manager. With the opening of the new nightclub in this country, his first task is to staff his establishment accordingly. And you, Yamamoto, have just become his first employee." Yamamoto chuckled. "I didn't know you ran a nightclub, Tsuna!" Tsuna hung onto the bus stop sign in defeat. "I had no idea until a few days ago either…" His new bartender laughed and clapped him on the back. "It'll be fun working together. I can't wait!" Tsuna groaned.

Back home, Tsuna slumped over his desk. "I can't believe you did that, Reborn! Why did you have to pick Yamamoto? Why not do an interview like a normal manager?" He pulled at his hair in despair. "What will his dad think of me now? It's all your fault, Reborn!" He shot a suffering look at Reborn. His tutor was sitting on his bed, having dismantled his shotgun and was now cleaning it. The green chameleon lounging on his fedora flicked one of its eyes toward him.

Reborn finished cleaning the barrel of his gun. "Aren't you glad, Tsuna? You have an employee now. A little understaffed, but I think the Vongola can manage." Tsuna let his head fall back down on the desk with a thud. "Why does this have to happen to me? What did I do to deserve this? I don't want to be the owner of some nightclub!" The last few words came out in a pitiful whine. Reborn smiled at him and chills creeped down Tsuna's spine. "I'll make you into the best nightclub owner in history, Tsuna."

Tsuna moaned and bashed his head against the desk.

* * *

**AN:** ...I promise the next chapter will be much more interesting? I hope? lol...


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